Friday Submission # 2

A Department of Water Resources representative, Philemon, stops at a Free State farm and talks with old farmer Koos.

He tells Koos, "I need to inspect your farm for the water allocation."

Koos says, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there."

Philemon says, "Meneer, I have the full authority of the ANC Government with me. See this card? This card means I am allowed to go WHEREVER I WISH on any agricultural land. No questions asked or answered. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?"

Koos nods politely and goes about his chores. Shortly, thereafter Koos hears loud screams and spies Philemon running for his life followed close behind by the farmer's bull, gaining with every step.

Philemon is clearly terrified, and is screaming for help, so the old farmer throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs.....


"Your card! Show him your card!

Did Anyone Order Some Burgers?

Endurance: Shackleton's Incredible Voyage by Alfred Lansing

In 1914 Sir Ernest Shackleton attempted to cross the continent of the Antarctic with 27 other men. I won't spoil it by letting you know that they didn't make it, the back of the book openly informs us of this. This story is not about crossing the Antarctic, it's about the survival of 28 men who, quite honestly, should have all perished on more than one occassion during their time spent in the ridiculously harsh conditions they endured.

Alfred Lansing tells the tale, which is totally non-fiction, in such a manner that huge adversities and mammoth obstacles are described in an almost monotone fashion. If he were to use the biggest and toughest words to describe each new event that threatened the crewmen's lives, then by page 30 all available adjectives would have been exhausted. Instead, the story is told in a simple factual manner, but you often find yourself stopping mid-sentence to take a moment to digest what you have just read, and on numerous occassions I found it mind-boggling that at the end of all this everyone makes it out alive.

This book takes leadership and a will to survive to a whole new level, the likes of which I will hopefully never experience in my lifetime. Read this book, it's inspiring.

Back in Time - The Stiles

When I was in Ireland the bulk of my time was spent residing at 101 The Stiles Road, which was in Clontarf, Dublin. The house itself was affectionately referred to as ‘The Stiles’. Living at the Stiles was nothing short of epic and some incredible times were had in this house. Complete with garden big enough to host a one day festival, The Stiles boasted 5 bedrooms, a lounge, dining room / kitchen, 1 bathroom (it’s only shortfall) and a garden shed big enough to host Shed Parties of up to 6.

At its peak, the Stiles had 9 people living in it. Primary residents included myself, Bren O’Connor, Laura Wilson, Marc Barnes, Jaco Eksteen, Phil Taylor (IRE), Anthony King, William George, and Tammy Leigh. Needless to say it felt full inside the Stiles’ belly, but with the sacrifice of personal space came the benefit of never ending fun. Bren and I on more than one occasion had the discussion where we both agreed that we used to get physically excited on the walk up the street to the Stiles after work, and we had to make a conscious effort to not run. You just never knew what you might find when you opened that front door. More often than not, you were greeted by the scent of lager and the sound of music coupled with laughter, and those butterflies you had in your stomach would be justified, because you knew there was something good happening inside.

Weekends were another story and can be summed up very aptly by one of our neighbours in a formal letter of complaint……..

”Every Friday, once the beer crates arrive and the music turns on, we know we have 48 hours of complete and utter chaos ahead of us, and peace and quiet with our children in the garden is a guaranteed non-event”

We weren’t proud of neglecting our neighbourly relations but it was difficult to find a sense of responsibility amongst all the madness. Memories I hope I never forget were being made every single weekend, and some of the parties we had in that house will never be reproduced in my lifetime. Those who lived and partied at the Stiles will know what I’m talking about and that house, along with the legends who lived there will never be forgotten.

Here are a handful of the memories that were made…..

Summer garden activities

Kino bought this 6kg pack of tile adhesive thinking he had bought charcoal for a braai

General chaos

The Colonel and Howie getting stuck in

Skate-boarding injury

A real life leprachaun